13 December 2021

Although not universally celebrated, most people are looking forward to Christmas and the holidays.

The food, the presents, the family reunions and for many, a spiritual time.

And it comes in the week that is literally the darkest point in the calendar.

In this darkest week we celebrate by giving to others, treating ourselves with special food and reconnecting with our loved ones. It’s an antidote to all the cold, dark days we have to endure.

This year we also have the constraints of the pandemic and we remember those family members we have lost, who cannot share it with us.

That’s why some people find Christmas a painful experience, or deeply disappointing, or lonely or full of conflict.

So many images on billboards, social media and television of perfect, beautiful people, having perfect meals with their perfect families.

Even the dogs look beautiful!

But rarely do our lives match up to this perfection.

So here are some tips if you are worried about Christmas:

  • Focus on what matters to you. What do you really value about this time? Can you make that clear to yourself? Perhaps discuss it out loud with your partner or someone you trust.
  • Try to make what matters to you happen. Don’t try to do it all. Focus on what matters and make that your priority.
  • Expect something to go wrong. Someone will not make it, change their minds or buy you an insulting present. When that happens, remind yourself that it was likely to happen and try not to take it personally.
  • When things are going great, savour them. Actively note to yourself that you’re enjoying this moment. If someone is with you, tell them how you are feeling.
  • Try not to spend money you don’t have. Debt can be a burden that haunts you for many months after Christmas has gone.
  • Drinking alcohol at Christmas is common. If you are going to drink, consider how much and when.
  • Don’t try to resolve family disputes over the festive period. Focus on what you value and leave the relationship work for another time. You might want to solve issues, but others are unlikely to be motivated.
  • Go for a walk after any big meals; research shows this reduces your cardiac risk significantly.
  • Seeing people and children enjoying their presents can very uplifting.
  • Avoid social media if the images of ‘perfect people’ upset you. It is rarely a truly accurate picture.
  • More than anything, try to relax and enjoy the things you enjoy.

Happy Christmas!